Hire Tat's Wife??

So today Tat's wife calls and starts telling me her woes about Tat and Triple D and she has no place to live, blah, blah, blah...  As the conversation wore on, I had to cut her off...

I'm real good at the computer, maybe I could do some secretary stuff (with a fake southern acccent, she's from MD)

I'm real good with kids, I can work in the kids' club (same fake southern accent and should I remind her that DFACS doesn't think she's capable of having custody of her own kids)

I'm a people person, how about I can be the receptionist (same fake southern accent and have I mentioned the weapons charges?)

Ok, so, you'll keep me in mind in case anything comes up (same fake southern accent and have I mentioned we have a restraining order on her and she can't come within 100 ft. of the facility?)

"You think you know EVERYTHING!"

Me:  I know you leave everyday at 12:30 and I'm paying you to be here until 2. 

Mean Lady:  (long silence with a shocked expression on her face)

Me:  So what's it going to be?  Do you want to part ways and I'll still be a reference for you?  Do you want to stay and going forward try not to offend children and their parents?  I'd like you to be here the entire time that you are writing on your timesheets.

Mean Lady:  Maybe if you would talk to your employees, you would actually know what is going on.

Me:  That's what I thought we were doing right now.  My issue is that two people have cancelled their memberships because "Mean Lady does not get along with my kids" and "Mean Lady seemed very annoyed that I brought my child in and he was the only one there, almost like she was trying to get rid of us because she had somewhere to be."  I checked their log ins and they were both getting here around noon, so I'm guessing that their perception was dead on.  If they worked out for an hour when they got here at 12, you would not be able to sneak out at 12:30.

Mean Lady:  You think you know EVERYTHING!  I'm done.