Things that make you want to stay in bed all day...

My email response to a friend asking me how things were going:

The gym is back to driving me f*#@ing crazy. It's 1 in the morning and I can't sleep because I'm so irritated. Spas are going good except I (well Jerry and I actually agree on this) would really like to fire one of our employees. I placed an ad on the University of Georgia & Florida career networks, so hopefully at least a few good resumes will come in soon. This moron got his fiancé pregnant, then she broke up with him and told him he wasn't the baby daddy, paternity test says he is the baby daddy, she let him see the kid a couple of days a week until he slept with her again, she got mad at him and stopped visitation. He got half a tattoo and couldn't pay to finish it (the tattoo guy happens to be our customer), claims he's paying an attorney to get custody so I ask the obvious question (knowing that he doesn't even have enough $ to finish the still incomplete tattoo)... "Are you prepared to pay child support?"... He responds with no response and a look that made me think I had grown two extra heads!! We had been giving him $300 per month for health insurance (another customer got him a medical/dental plan for $161 so he was actually profiting $139) and found out while he was driving himself to the hospital on April 2nd that he had let his policy lapse. We've since come to find out that in the last twelve months of giving him $300 per month that he only ever paid one month (October 2012). He then sends the Reverend of his church in to talk to Jerry about his massive emergency room bill, Jerry explains why this is Half Tat's own problem. In fact he was just given $300 yesterday April 1st for his medical plan. If he didn't have a medical plan, you would have thought this would have been mentioned yesterday. Sorry Shocked Reverend, this is a Half Tat's problem and yes people lie even to their preachers. The subject hasn't come up again. Did I mention he's missed work because well the symptoms (and my loyal gym gossips) point to alcoholism... And let's not forget that he (who has no $ and has a massive emergency room bill) asked for two weeks off in July and one week in August... WTF? 

Sunshine is out!

Me:  I need your keys. Since you don't have hours anymore there is no need for you to have them and I need them because I gave mine to the new weekend girl. I also need back the DVDs that came with the TRX and anything else you may have. Army seemed to think the TRX were yours??  They are not. And lastly, this is hard for me but I need only to be in the gym when you are training your clients. You can't workout there anymore. I'm sorry but its to the point where your behavior is damaging to the gym and we are at risk of losing several members. Thank you for everything that you have done, but please only come to the gym when you are training actual clients.
Serena


 Sunshine:  I have no idea where this is coming from. First I have never told anyone the TRX Straps are mine, so why Army would even say that I have no idea.. I don't have the DVD I watched it and put it back.. I know other people have taken it to watch it.. I also do not understand where it is coming from that I am rude to members.. I get made fun if because I talk to everyone in there...so to have this all if a sudden that I am getting complaints that I am being rude really hurts...I'm sure Army is saying I am because like mist people in the gym I am trying to stay away from him.. I am tired of his lies and they way he tells stories...I have been with you guys for 4yrs and have been nice to everyone.. I have always pushed to try to make this gym a great gym.. So how is it that when I try to better my life by getting a new job all of a sudden you keep getting complaints... I know there are certain people on staff that are taking every chance to make things up to try to push me out... But I hope after 4 yrs you know I am not the one to run people off or do something that is not good for the gym....



Me:  I think it's great that you are doing something that will better yourself. The truth is people have complaining that you are rude since day 1. We went from 100% of people complaining about you down to about 40%. Now we're back up to 100%. I'm well aware that your behavior is much different if Jerry or I are coming to the gym. Just please lay low and stay out of the gym until people calm down. I don't know what exactly is going on with you but something has changed. When there starts to be crap on the message board about popping pills and unicorns, there's a problem. Who else knew about the TRX DVDs?  You still haven't returned the insanity DVDs, so I'm thinking that its possible you may still have a TRX DVD and not know it. At this point we have to rationally decide what is best for the gym and what's best right now is to not lose a dozen members. Thanks for your cooperation.
Serena

What's your symbol?

Apparently not smarter than a 2nd grader...

I found on the close outs one cash sale for $14.93.  I put $15 in with the closeouts.  This left me $5.85 short plus the 7 cents from the $15.  I have gone into my wallet and added the extra money to get the register to an even $50.There are only a few of us touching this register.  It should remain at $50.  Also, if either of you has some ones or fives, the register has 3 tens, a five and six ones currently.

Thanks,
Serena

Staff:  Not sure how I managed that one? I'll even it up when I get there. 

Staff:  I put 5.85 in there and now it says 55.85? I don't know what's wrong I'm just gonna leave the extra money in there I guess. Better to be over then under. 

So they can't count or read...  I have gone into my wallet and added the extra money to get the register to an even $50.

Hazel BUSTED

So the new manager started at the gym this week.  He is shaking things up! Tuesday night he met Hazel.  He described her as "dressed to go clubbing" and she came in with her daughters and flirted with Smiley for 30 minutes.  Hazel did not realize that the new manager was there and overheard her entire conversation with Smiley.  He finally approached her and introduced himself, walked her around the gym and asked her exactly what she was supposed to be doing because he was sure that flirting with the staff and standing at the front desk weren't what we were paying her for!  PRICELESS!  This sent her into a rage and flurry of texts and phone calls started.

Please call me when u have a min I have a question for u (8:53 pm)

Three phone calls from Hazel (8:54, 8:57, 9:03)

Hey Serena I called Sunshine because I was told not to do half the gym tonight and didn't want him calling. U because it not done please call me in am we need to talk (9:04pm)

Hey Serena I'm going to let y'all find someone else it's just to much for me anyone and the changes that are being made I can't work around so u just owe me for Monday and last night we did trash and bathrooms as we were told to leave floor alone I want to thank u for the time u let me work there and ill pick my check up Friday thanks and best wishes finding what y'all are looking for (8:33 am)

Ok

Could u just leave my money if ur there today or tomorrow and ill come by and get it (11:36am)

I'm not there again til Friday

Ok I'll pick it up Friday then and I'm sorry I just can't give 5 hrs a today there and that's the goal he has but it will be good for the gym it needs that's What's a good time to run by tomorrow u are going to pay me for the two days right ?  (8:46pm)

I was going to even though rumor is you didn't clean anything Tuesday night...

That is not true we didn't vac gym floor because I was told by the new manager not to and was told we were never to clean gym floor when members are on it that's crazy because there always people there I would tell u Serena I Tryed to call u about that to I worked for u for months and I would have kept working for u but I can't understand the things he wants without doing it after hrs

You didn't clean bathrooms which was really all that was left to clean.  I took your advice and opened my eyes. The new manager overheard your entire conversation with Smiley. Apparently you didn't have anything good to say about me and weren't exactly acting like you were married. Do not text/call me anymore. 

We did clean bathrooms and I changed Curtin in men's room and mats the others where good so I was holding off till they needed it yes Serena we sure did do bathrooms I never said anything to Smiley in front of the new manager about anything nor about u Serena what are u talking about So u have no plans to pay me what u owe me I did do my work and never said one thing about u to anyone nor acted anyway with Smiley my girls were by my side that is a lie

Real eyes and ears are better than security cameras.  I'll pay you for Monday. I'd prefer to mail a check to you. I do not want you anywhere near my building. 

With if it where true yeah but it's not the new manager walked me threw gym asking ? I didn't even talk with Smiley my girls did I said hello and then I was with the manager walking gym over

Send me your address and stay away from the gym. 

I can't believe u are acting this way to me I have done not one thing Wrong and I cleaned on Tuesday night to I mean I guess my gas and time mean nothing

That's fine I understand

Send me your address

 And the way y'all had done me is sorry u can ask Smiley I did clean Tuesday but its ok I don't treat people that way and really don't understand but it will all show in time thank u

Are You Smarter Than a 2nd Grader?

Serena!! There is money missing from the cash box!!

Coins are money too!! 

When I got home just to make sure I wasn't nuts, I asked my daughter how to make a dollar.

Here's To You MRS. ROBINSON

So Serena, what's going on with you & the young hottie?

He's a trainer and we were exercising.  I used to train with Tat but he's gone.

He's so hot!  Is he dating anyone?

EWWW... I'm old enough to be his mom!  I might actually be older than his mom.  How old are you??